Saturday, July 26, 2014

The Unofficial Musikfest Survival Guide 2014

            Greetings, readers and newcomers!  If you're reading this, it's probably because you're either a regular reader or you're someone planning on attending Musikfest for any length of time (the whole Loki-damn festival runs annually; in 2014, it's from August 1st to August 10th).  Being a slightly experienced Musikfest attendee (Shut up, Spellcheck!), I figured I should give tips on how to survive it.  Just keep in mind that these tips will not help you in the event of zombie outbreak/riot/Dalek invasion/Cybermen invasion/Sontaran invasion/any other alien invasion/a beloved superhero going rogue/dragon attack/vampire attack/werewolf attack/Empire conquest/asteroid Apophis striking the immediate area/the Apocalypse (or Ragnarok if you prefer it that way).

            Also, I suggest you take these suggestions to heart so that you may further enjoy Musikfest without having some locals hate you.

Anyways, shall we begin or shall I continue to chatter the beginning away in silence?  Your optional blog post theme song for today is Deus Ex Human Revolution remix by defibrillator .music!


Beverages


            Yes, there will be booze among the drinks offered at the festival.  Which brings me to the tips under this category:
1.) Do not drink more than you can handle, so long as you're of age.  If you're underage, you should A.) stop reading this (because this is an R-Rated blog; believe me, I can see you, you chain-smoking hipster teen who's still in high school and totally under 18 years old), and B.) consider either water or soft drinks.  Because drinking illegally will only give you not only glares from me but also the likelihood of police involvement.

I should mention that even I take this to heart.  So you should, too; you don't want to wind up like the former regular who was banned from the Underground Lair, do you?

2.) The Musikfest Mugs are available each year, refillable, for use of consuming alcohol (usually), and it will cost you more than a regular-size drink.  And unless you are interested in collecting the different mugs, as the designs on the outside change from year to year, you do not have to buy one each year that you come!  It has been my experience that mugs from previous years are also allowed to be filled with your drink of choice.  Just heed rule #1, please!

            I have purchased one myself and used it for alcoholic beverages; that's how I found out that my limit is 24-oz. of non-tequila mixed drink. (I don't like many of the beers.  I've tried and tried, wound up mismatching the beer to the food, and at this point, I'm on the verge of giving up.)  If I do opt to drink a 24-oz sonic screwdriver or a 24-oz. Drunk Arnold Palmer (take the iced tea-lemonade mixture, spike it with vodka), I (as everyone should) will be careful with it, by eating before-hand, watching my pace, etc.  I do not want to wind up calling someone up and saying, "I'm drinking lots of water," three times in the same conversation again.  (Sorry, sis!)

3.) Keep hydrated!  Specifically not with outside water!  There are bottles of water available, as well as soft drinks and what-not at particular stalls at the festival, and beer/vodka/insert-liquor-of-choice-here does NOT hydrate you.  You'll just wind up passed out way before bedtime on the festival grounds with people staring at you.

4.) I don't think the ghost-kind-of spirits (as well as the living caretakers) of God's Acre and Nisky Hill Cemetery will appreciate the drunken debauchery on their graves.  Please avoid drinking, pissing, crapping, vomiting, polluting, and passing out in these locations, LEST THOU AND THY FAMILY BE CURSED!!!  (I am neither liable nor responsible for any actual applications of curses.  If you do get cursed, the onus falls on you for failing to apply common sense and self-restraint.  And no, I don't know where your car is; stop asking me.)

Transportation

             I shit you not, transportation (whether it's by vehicle or on foot) is always a problem at Musikfest!  And I hope to everything that people attending will be more careful this year!  Especially if you share this blog post....

5.) The rules of the road always apply, even if there is a festival going on!  Seriously, I know you have places to go, alcohol (or other beverages) to drink, sights to see, etc, but it doesn't mean that you can just ignore the NO TURN ON RED signs that are basically at EVERY intersection that's there!  Believe me, I almost got run over because of people not paying attention to road signs andchoosing to be bad drivers!  Just fucking pay attention!  Also, pedestrians, there are crosswalks with crossing signals that have buttons you can push!  I strongly suggest that you use them!  Because *rumor voice* I hear that the city will start implementing jaywalking laws on August 1st; the people from California know what I'm talking about…. >:3

6.) MIND THE TRAFFIC!  The usual complaints from the locals is how bad the traffic is, and I can see how bad it can get!  So follow rule #5, please!  So people (like me) don't get hurt!  Which will bring ambulances around which will make traffic even worse!!!  So just be aware of pedestrians, bikers, flying saucers, Godzilla, other drivers, buses, etc!

7.) There will be tons of parking issues during Musikfest.  Seriously, there are lots that are either pay-to-park (expensive) or off-limits!!!!  Seriously, "Residents Only" actually does mean "OFF LIMITS"!!!!  Unless you like getting your car towed at your expense….
-----There will be special bus routes available for certain locations, and that will allow you to park your car for cheaper than $20 per day.  Which brings me to an actual tip:  Park at the Westgate Mall and then ride the LANTA bus ($2 USD one-way; $4 USD day pass; availability limited to schedules; ask bus driver for details) to and from the festival.

8.) Please, please, please, please, PLEASE do not walk through apartment building parking lots (or the apartment buildings themselves) to get someplace!  I don't care how late it is or how drunk you are, it's still a huge security risk: people can get hurt, residents don't know who is going to try stealing their cars, and you'll wake people up by doing that!  You can achieve the same effect of getting to where you want to go by going around the parking lot and not through it!  Yes, it's tiring, but it's good exercise: not only physically but also in respect for property owners and residents alike!

Other Tips Fest-Goers Should Be Aware Of

These are the tips I did not cover in the above categories…..

9.)  On top of #8, yes!  I get it: You're drunk, you're happy, you're having a good time, but the residents don't need to hear you cheering and shouting like the visiting students from fucking West Virginia University!  (Bethlehem, PA, is Marshall territory, because I said so!)  Just please keep it down so they can sleep!  Everyone needs their sleep; the fest will be there tomorrow....unless it's the last day.

10.)  It should go without saying that federal, state and local laws apply, as do the rules for Musikfest (which are available in the pamphlets, on their website and on signs on festival grounds).

11.) Above all else, HAVE A SHIT TON OF FUN!!!! (as long as you don't piss people off)  Seriously, what's the point of attending the fest if you're not there to have fun?  (Well, yeah, besides being a vendor/merchant/business owner/employee/performer....)

For More Info….

            If you are asking a question about Musikfest that has nothing to do with what I covered above, I suggest you click on THIS link about Musikfest or try asking at one of the information booths.

            I do plan on attending (and tweeting about it), and I hope everyone follows these tips!  If you choose not to, well, then it's your own damn fault for someone turning into the Hulk and smashing people and things all because you decided to press that last hot button they have.

            Anyways, I might see you there, or I might not.  In any case, I hope you play it safe and ENJOY YOUR DRUNKEN/MUSICAL FUN TACQUITO!!!!!
(Apologies to ArtsQuest and the City of Bethlehem, PA, for being ^^^that^^^ kind of nerdy blogger.)

Thursday, July 24, 2014

What the Fuck Happened?! A Long Overdue Update

            OOOOOOF!!!!  It's been such a looong time since I last did a blog post!  The last post was probably done in April, before I traveled over to California Dalek's sector (I'm hoping for your sake, Cali, that it doesn't get split up into six separate states.) and forgot to continue doing blog posts and my XP log!  D:  Not to mention that afterwards, I kind of let my library fines get CRAZY and that prevented me from doing blog posts.  Also, I borrowed wifi for a bit--until it went away.  So now it's back to using the library's CRAPPY computers again.  Oh yeah, (optional) theme music!  It's going to be AC DC - Back In Black (Jim Heinz Remix) by theMHRproject2.


            Anyways, here's what happened to me during that period of time; however, it's going to be a bunch of bullet points that I hope aren't super lengthy, so strap in…..

          Π Trip to California—I was able to travel to California for a week and a half, visit family, check out Disney's California Adventure (after Disney refreshed it to help bump up the various problems with the park that helped drive away crowds), have EXCELLENT food at restaurants I will share the review of soon, complain about hotel accommodations, wander around the San Francisco airport, go through Newark Airport after midnight when all the businesses are CLOSED, get my hair trimmed by my aunt, and just enjoy my vacation burrito.  Oh, and I did go to Meltdown Comics (+10 Life List XP!) and be all touristy there after having a bizarre Garmin-led adventure through these towns outside of LA, take a look at the various populations and even see a mission while we (Dad and myself) drove by.  I consider it to be quite a success.  (No, Chris didn't autograph my copy of the Nerdist Way yet because he wasn't there.  Which actually helped because I was kind of super nervous—I wasn't sure if I wanted to really meet Chris and other people from Nerdist Industries, being all anxious with my small-town fansquirrel feels.  But I did enjoy going there!)  Next time, I shall be successful, with autographs and @midnight tapings that I probably could've not missed had my father not been as discouraging as he was before the trip!  Yes, Dad, I will make sure to get the tickets this time; just try talking to Mom first, okay?
   
Π     Pennsylvania Autism Training Conference—June 11th and 12th, I was able to attend a conference at the Eden Resort in Lancaster, PA!  And I did it (mostly) by myself as an exhibitor in the expo part of the conference!  I was doing quite a bit of art prior to the show in an effort to be all prepared and to sell some pieces.  Which I was able to do, fortunately: I sold three framed paintings!  That's $90 USD total!  Not a great profit margin but I'm happy about that success!  I was able to meet other people who are also on the Autism spectrum and have a good time!  And it was all PAID FOR!  I didn't have to spend a single cent on anything unless I wanted to!  Not to mention that it's a fancy hotel with suites, one of which I stayed in by myself!  Yeah, I got a whole suite to myself and it was super fancy!  There was even a phone in the bathroom!  (There's a difference between fancy and swanky: fancy is like, a super expensive hotel where you could have a wedding.  Swanky is top hats, monocles, fainting couches that are actually chaise lounges in the ladies' restroom.  And while we're on the topic, "formal gala" is basically what you would see at a Presidential or Royal ball: ballgowns, suits, servants in butler uniforms (read: "suits with tails"), orchestra, etc.)  Mom and Dad were not only proud of me, but so surprised that they said they could've stayed over with me.  I'm like, "But your schedules say no!"  Anyways, I'm glad I was able to pursue going to this event.  Thank you to my Supports Coordinator, everyone who organized the conference, the Eden Resort staff, Mom and Dad (for being SO supportive and understanding) and my Community Inclusion peeps!  As well as the people who purchased my art!  That is one fancy/gourmet tacquito I totally enjoyed!
     Π    Personal Stuff—I have been doing a lot lately within my life, and much of it was for the better: I got the Adult Autism Waiver (hence the conference, Supports Coordinator, Community Inclusion, etc.), I got to clean up my apartment, keep it clean, be very responsible, and it really cheered up my parents!  My psychiatrist was happy about all the progress we reported to him, as is my therapist!  In fact, so many good things took place that I started making a "Good Things List" that really helps keep the mood positive and helps counter the lies that depression tells us are true.  Here's a sample:
ü  I'M ALIVE!
ü  I'M  OKAY!
ü  I'm making a ton of progress!
ü  I was able to stay at a hotel in a suite by myself--and it was paid for!
ü  I sold three paintings with a small profit!
ü  Mom is happier!
ü  Parents are more supportive of my artistic and creative pursuits!
ü  I'm being productive!
ü  I'm getting the supports I need!
ü  I'm not really alone.
ü  I enjoyed some nerd humor.
ü  I started having a following under not only the name I blog with but also my secret identity!  (Major yays!)
ü  I'm a little more organized.
ü  There is less yelling and arguing between me and my parents.
ü  There is generally a good mood in the air!
ü  My meds work for my depression AND the anxiety I sometimes feel.
ü  Parents are more understanding!  :D
ü  Assessments (for Autism Waiver) showed how many things improved!
ü  I have not argued with parents in at least one month!
ü  Problem solving skill levels are up!
ü  I'm more attentive.
ü  I can relax over mistakes I make.  (Like missing a therapy appointment is NOT the end of the world for me at this point!)

            If you're dealing with depression, why not do what I did?  It really helps to have something to go back to, like a list of happy truths that can tell depression to fuck off!

            Of course, this is only part of the story: just recently, I discovered that at least one of my wisdom teeth has to be removed.  The dentist couldn't do it at the office I usually go to (1.5 to 2 hour bus ride away; 1/2 hour by car) couldn't do it so I have to go see a specialist.  I was super upset and anxious about it, fearful even, mostly due to the fact that I will not be conscious during the procedure (Do I even want to be?!?!?!).  And I'm fearful of how I will be loopy immediately after the procedure; however, my allies in the Twitterverse definitely cheered me up!




            I love you guys/gals/Daleks/other sentient races!  You totally made me laugh when I needed it and you let me know that it's super common for people to undergo wisdom teeth removal.  (Lucky Mom!  She doesn't have wisdom teeth so she doesn't have to go through it!)  And according to my parents, the car ride home will be super fun due to the loopy phase I will be going through; so with all of that info being fed to me through my ear holes, I think I should just drunkenly smile and ride that dragon all the way home.
            Question is, will the dragon be real, colored purple, fluent in cat, and smell like root beer?

            Anyways, I must prepare for the possibility that my base will be overrun with drunks due to the 10-day presence of Musikfest.  Yes, overrun with drunks.  It's a shame that I can't have weapons here at my residence, because if the drunks turn into real zombies, I'm fucked.  But I might be one of those drunks anyways because I plan on going.  Just look for the drunk Padawan that's actually more sober than the rest of the people attending the festivities while strategically avoiding the polka tent except for possibly passing through to take one of the paths traveled a little less because foot traffic.

            Anyways, I believe this update is sufficient enough to say, "I'm sorry for disappearing because stuff and I will be back to blogging; here's an update to share the stuff."  Now, to plot out my Birthday/Christmas Wishlist of Awesomes (that's already a few yards long because of ThinkGeek's Wishlist feature)…..  And I promise to try and post some blogs I drafted out already.  But that's for another time.


Enjoy your California/Amish drunk/high tacquito!