A Furiously Happy Book Review--One That I Hope to Bloggess that Jenny Is Reading

Some tunes to listen to if you wanted…..a playlist! Yays!

             After the previous blog post, I feel this urge to apologize for freaking people out with my possibly-withdrawal-induced feelings of depression and hopelessness where I felt the need to painfully rip off the blindfold I was wearing while running from the black hole-like sinkhole. (I actually shouldn’t; it’s okay for me to share these feelings, even healthy.) It was a letter to myself, an important conversation that needed to be had in order for problems to be solved. It was also a great big flashing sign I could use to direct people in a direction that many people would call “making progress,” even though (to me, at least) it is comparable to me being the reporter out in the field running for her life from a sinkhole, while the hosts of the news channels watched with genuine concern.

             I think this warrants an update: I’m doing better emotionally, which probably can be attributed to the withdrawal from lack of ADD meds. I suspect that this withdrawal (which took place for three or four weeks, during which my doctor pulled a dick move by not filling any of my ADD meds--which meant I ran out, something one should never do ever with any psychiatric meds--until I get my fasting blood tests done) was responsible for most of the issues I had, probably proof it messed up my brain. At least, now I can attribute the need to be fed properly in the morning and the weird I-skipped-on-my-meds dreams to the stimulants and lack thereof, respectively.

             But that’s not what you’re here for--you want to know my thoughts on ​Furiously Happy​, the new book by Jenny Lawson (the Bloggess) that JUST came out!  Right?!  (As in at midnight the night of September 21st--because midnight is when September 22nd starts. Thanks, temporal druids known as Jesuits for inventing this weird concept!) I was so excited and eager that I was able to get my own copy from Target with Dad’s help--thank you, Papa Spock! (I did pay him back for my copy.) And I was so happy I even texted my older sister….to which she responded with a question: “Did the Amazon Pre-Order get there already???” ​HUH?????​ After a puzzled response (probably along the lines of “What are you talking about?”), I found out that my sister had pre-ordered the book for me from Amazon the moment she heard me talk about it weeks before it even came out. Which is sweet, but left me with a dilemma: which copy of the book should I return?!?!?! My answer/decision was NEITHER!!!! I opted to keep them both because I don’t want to feel weird about it; Papa Spock went out of his way to get me a copy of my own, and my sis was thinking of me and being incredibly awesome by gift-ordering a copy of the book that she knew I really wanted and was determined to get. (At least now we know that next time, probably when Jenny’s third book is coming out--hopefully, even though I shouldn’t count my chicks before their eggs are even laid--my sis will tell me whether she pre-ordered it or not so that this weird situation doesn’t happen again.) On the bright side, I get TWICE the furious happiness!!!!

            Anyways, if you’d rather a look at the content I may or may not have spoiled with Twitter breadcrumbs, here’s my Storify compilation:

Yes, those are the breadcrumbs I left on Twitter with the hope that the strangers who are following me on Twitter will read and be like, “HUH? Oh my goddess’ titties! Lol! I should take a look at this “Furiously Happy” thing….. *click* Oh, wow, people love it! I should get it!” (I’m not sure if #FuriouslyHappy was trending on the Twitters, but if it did, AWESOME!)

         In reality, while reading and tweeting along by text message, I was wearing my pajamas (a nightshirt and yoga pants) and a Darn Good Yarn magic skirt (made of SILK) while laying on my couch and reading furiously (happily) in an effort to finish the book before the day was over so I can post this review. And while reading, I was giggling, quiet with awe, nodding with understanding, crying with laughter, and then crying at the end because I knew what Jenny was talking about. I truly understood the battle that so many people, myself among them, are fighting every single day.  I was empathizing on a deeper level, because I knew that my own battle was quite a bit different from everyone else’s. It’s at this point (at the end) where I wanted to just run (or quickly walk up) to Jenny, and embrace her tightly while crying into her shoulder (which is a little overboard for an interaction between two people who only know each other through the Interwebs) and going, “Thank you! THANK YOU!!!! You understand it--thank youuuu!!!! ​I love you for this!!!!​” (I’m crying even while typing this.) I probably wouldn’t do that last proclamation, but when a fan of yours runs up and hugs you, molesting your boobs with tears and shouting “thank you,” over and over again, it could go that way.

By Sweet-Crow

           I’m giving this book over 9,000 white-point stars/plungers out of 5 (the plungers are for the Daleks), not just because it was funny, but because it was a truth that needed to be shared with the world. People, not just those with depression, but also government officials, doctors in all fields, insurance company employees, family members, friends, etc., should know what life with depression could be like. They should know that even celebrities such as Wil Wheaton and Phil Plait and other well-known faces in the celebri-sphere have some sort of mental illness, and that having a mental illness or emotional/mental diffability ​should not​ be stigmatized! As much as you think it’s super rare, when you read the comments on Jenny’s blog posts about depression, you’ll realize that it is a lot more common than you think, and that we are not alone in our struggles. There are ​at least​ 50 other people in the world fighting to escape similar sinkholes to the one I’m running from, struggling and fighting to stay ahead, but wearing themselves out in the process.  There are times when even I get tired and would stop to catch my breath only to feel the earth beneath my feet start to give way, which tells me that I have only an opportunity window of a few seconds (relatively speaking) to fire the grappling hook at something far off in the distance for help. That the battles we’re fighting could be described differently from my sinkhole metaphor, as trenches filling with water that we have to escape, lest we drown.

          So, yeah, depression is a bitch and an asshole because it’s lying to you and bullying you into thinking “Life would be so much better without me.” That is bullshit, and I can attest to that--when my sis and I were growing up in the hellhole in the middle of nowhere (in Pennsylvania; sorry, Iowa, but you can’t change history), we were relentlessly picked on; I was bullied, she was bullied….It was hard, but it got worse still when her classmates in a ​Catholic high school​ where picking on her, to the point when they were saying that she should “just kill herself.” How could they?!  That is ​WRONG​!   Nobody should EVER encourage taking their own life! Not even CEOs of Evil Corp! (spoiler alert for Mr. Robot fans who did not see the season 1 finale) This is why we should educate people on mental illness so that they are well-informed and less of a dick about living with depression and/or anxiety.

         Look, you’re not alone in your struggles.  I have them.  Mama Squirrel and my sis have them. LOTS of people have them, and we will feel alone during these times; but we should know that our tribe is out there. Yes, I’m a member of Jenny Lawson’s tribe of weirdos who fight with depression, and I’m proud of it! I’m a member of the Church of Bloggessianism! I frequently tweet with Daleks on Twitter! I even joke around with my parents about needing towels and possibly also getting a giant metal chicken during that shopping trip! This is the tribe I belong to, the nerdy weirdos wielding plungers at trees that we thought were zombies!

          You may be weird and even a little fucked-up, but so am I. What’s important is deciding whether you should march alone or with the rest of us; because people marching by themselves are looked upon as “stupid” and “childish” and “wrong,” but people marching together? That’s a full fuckin’ marching band with its own class and character!!!!

         Keep this in mind while reading this book--which you should buy your own copy of! Unless your sister already ordered it for you; you should check with her first before buying it…..

Until then, ENJOY YOUR ANTIDEPRESSANT-LAIDEN NON-LEATHERY GALLSTONE-FREE
FURIOUSLY HAPPY TACQUITO!!!!!

Some Sort of Paradise: A Review of Utopia, Fox's New Reality Show--UPDATED

***At the time of publishing this post, Utopia is already in its 12th Day, with one person (the former convict) having already left the place after ranting and cursing and being generally angry.  Two people came in his place.***

---

            Sorry for no post last week.  I was sick with some sort of cold or respiratory infection, so I was like, "Fuck it, I'M QUARANTINED!" for the entire week.  (Thanks, Mom and Dad, for dropping off the store brand DayQuil and NyQuil med stuff.  It really helped a lot!)  I was staying inside, not doing much except eating, sleeping, medicating and repeating.  And watching shows on TV and listening to podcast episodes and playing computer games.  So this week, I'm lifting my self-imposed quarantine and trying to not strangle people because of my impacted unwise wisdom tooth (that needs to geddafuckout!) in order to re-acclimate to the outside world.  Meanwhile, I was able to watch one of the premieres of a new reality show on television: Utopia and then following it up with some disturbing news on Fox.

            Which brings me to my optional theme song mix for this post: Spacemind's "Space Ark"

Justice for Cruelty: People Are Not Punching Bags

            Thanks to news teasers on Fox, I was convinced that I needed to watch a segment about howsome idiot youths were filming themselves beating up an older man who hasdisabilities (or, as the media likes to put it, "special needs man," or "mentally challenged man".  It's a step in the right direction, but now try using Person-First language.  News media outlets are the source of "disability-first language"' usage, and I want to change that all over the mediascape.).  First, some idiotteen at Musikfest tries to use brass knuckles (of which possession is ILLEGAL everywhere in the States) to beat up an older man who was defending his wife, all because the idiot teen and his girlfriend "weren't being respected."  And now some dumbasses think it's a good idea to just beat up someone with disabilities who is older than them and to put it up on YouTube.

            Let me tell you something: IT'S NEVER A GOOD IDEA TO DO THAT!  In PA, it counts as assault.  And just hurting someone who has a disability (or two….or five….) is wrong no matter what you think because it only means you're so gutless and cowardly and full of shit that you have to pick on someone you see as "lower than you" or (and I hate using this word) "retarded," which, today, translates to "stupid," among the youth (who need to learn etymology more; "mental retardation" is a term used for a disability that delays the mental and emotional development of a person).

            This sucks.  I'm outraged by their actions.  Not to mention that I'm now more cautious: I have no interest in being treated that way, and I have a lot more self-respect than those losers.  But if I'm ever faced with that situation, I'll either try and make a quick exit or I'll stand my ground, using my intellect to scare them off, while calling 911 because I'd rather have cops there to handle the situation than to be left alone.

            This is why it is important for there to be self-defense classes provided for people on the Autism Spectrum; it's so they can defend themselves if idiots like the ones in the news decide copy their attitude, arrogance and actions to seem tough, and to teach us self-discipline.

            Seriously, this bullshit is not something I would EVER tolerate in my Utopia; the perps would be thrown to the zombies.

Building Paradise: My Garden Does Not Look Like This….

            Yes, I'm going to review this new reality show called "Utopia".  So what?  (I'm not referring to the idyllic location that Professor Yana was trying to launch a giant rocket towards, by the way.)

            It's not like it's Big Brother; far from it!  You see, what's different about this show is that there isn't a real prize like cash or a house or a vacation or whatever is tangible in this realm.  It's actually a social experiment (like every Big-Brother-structured reality competition show is) that is to be done over the course of a year, examining every participant's idea of a perfect world or perfect society and how they can create it.  The Pioneers (the first fourteen or fifteen people in this society where cameramen aren't around) are vastly different, with backgrounds ranging from pastors to professional chefs to Apocalypse preppers to yogis to expecting mothers and even convicts; my personal favorite among them is Hex the Huntress, who has brought her own bow and quiver of arrows Utopia!

            The idea of the show itself is audacious enough: a perfect society where the Pioneers are not allowed to be outside the gates, but outsiders are allowed in during certain hours.  It's self-governed, remotely monitored 24/7 for an entire year, and the electricity and food had to be obtained by themselves, a complete bubble with a fish-filled pond, a pool, chickens, cows (or "Mootopians"), fertile land, some money and a barn.  The group itself is not going to stay the same, as more people will come and others will go.  It's all going to be streamed live, all day and all night, and the audience will have a chance to join the group inside the gates, applying to casting to say, "I want to help build a perfect society!  SIGN ME UP!"

            And it's already on its first two weeks: soon after the project started, there have been conflicts ALREADY!  Someone didn't want to share his things because it's all he had, another man (whose ego is bigger than the show, I bet) drank too much whiskey and was being a total pervert, the redneck and the chef exchanged heated words and butted heads, literally and figuratively, which led to the redneck almost just up and leaving.  There were lots of people stripping down until they're nothing but naked blurs with faces and arms diving into the pool, and a few of the Pioneers are uncomfortable with that because they're that frickin' conservative.

            And yes, I live tweeted during Part 1 of the premiere:

#nowwatching the premiere of #utopia and live tweeting it! I wouldn't have done a pastor because preachy.
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

Owch. Conflict already. That's what happens when you don't break the ice right away. #utopia list passions and weaknesses right away?
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

"What could possibly go wrong?" The oft uttered curse/jinx of every good idea. #utopia
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

Josh is a jerk of a drunk. I think the rest of the group needs to monitor his alcohol intake if he isn't thrown out already. #utopia
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

#inmyutopia criminal justice would be tribunal as in: witnesses then defendant testify, and jury without their presence. #utopia
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

I've never heard of a #chickentractor before. But now, because of #utopia, i want one for a friend of the family! @thebloggess
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) September 8, 2014

            And I do believe that this is interesting enough, but they're not done yet; I have some ideas that they should implement with their rules and practices and stuff.

         Π    Anyone who breaks a rule or something to the point where it pisses the others off should spend the next 24 hours shoveling manure and sleeping with the cows that night, if it's a minor offense.  Major offenses or repeat offenders should be ejected from the society.

         Π    Court is a good idea: let the offender and 3 to 5 witnesses give their testimonies, and then have them go out and wait for the verdict that will be decided amongst the rest of the Pioneers.  Punishments must also be determined during deliberations.  (Manure shoveling should be a punishment!)

         Π    Get a full on bull or something, a cow that can help the female cows make little calves, which results in better yield for milk!  Same with a rooster for the chickens; animals don't live forever!

         

  Π    Get some sheep and a ram, as well as a couple of goats so that the wool can be sheared off, carded, spun into yarn and used to make clothing that they can sell online for more money or to replace torn or lost clothing.  Also get a loom, so you can weave together sheets and blankets for the cold winter months, and knitting needles for scarves and hats and stuff; knitting and weaving aren't hard to learn, but it's fun to do and it boosts self-esteem.

         Π    If Amanda gives birth inside the grounds, let a certified midwife come and help out with delivery in the barn with sheets hanging around them and almost everyone else waiting outside, then get Amanda and the baby off to the damn hospital to get them both examined just in case.  Medicine is not optional; people in colonies like Plymouth and Salem and Johnstown did get sick and die from illnesses and childbirth and whatnot, and we don't need a Utopia that is quarantined with CDC officials milling around in Hazmat suits just because someone believes that they shouldn't get vaccinated.  (Also, get someone to come by and give vaccinations.  Pioneers who are vaxxers don't have to get them as they can suffer the fucking consequences of their "decision", but not everyone is a vaxxer.  VACCINATE!)

         Π    Don't shy away from Twitter; we (Utopians, aka fans of Utopia) love communicating with you, and should be able to give feedback when asked.

            At least, that's what my perfect society should be doing.  That and making thrones for me.  :P

            Anyways, the idea is audacious (so is building a colony on Mars), but it should be interesting to see what does and does not work for creating a perfect society.  At least then, I can get to work on building my colony for when the zombie apocalypse comes; so far, all I can come up with is either live in Antarctica or on one of the rocky Aleutian islands off Alaska, or to move in with Bigfoot and Chewbacca.

            Unsure how many Dalek plungers out of 5 to rate this show, because the jury is still out on how many should be awarded.  But it is something to be checked out.  I shall continue to watch until I get bored!

            Until then, ENJOY YOUR PERFECT TACQUITO!

"Perfection is overrated.  I still strive for it, though, because it makes sense to me." — myself

***Utopia airs on FOX on Tuesdays at 8pm EDT and Fridays at 9pm EDT. Live streaming is available on the website at http://www.utopiatv.com/home and requires a "passport" for people to vote for new members and view videos and live streams.***

UPDATE: After about two months, Fox cancelled Utopia, due to low ratings.  Which is sad.....

RIP Utopia (2014-2014)

The Twelfth Hour Tolls: A Review of "Deep Breath," Capaldi's First Full Episode as the Doctor

            If you're reading this, you might've guessed that I was just scrambling into my seat at the computer, cracking my knuckles, warming up my plunger and whisk, and started engaging in furious writing, eager to share my thoughts, theories and reactions to a new face taking up the role of our most famous and beloved alien time traveler.  And for that, I have brought you the Rogue Dubstep remix of "Clocks" by Coldplay as the optional theme song for this review!

            Once again, our beloved Gallifreyan time-traveling (formerly raggedy) madman Doctor has regenerated, leaving us floundering in painful tears as we try latching upon ANY REASON to love the new "Clock Doc" (as I like to call him)!  And after the few episodes of stale writing left us with a thirst for fresher excitement of the Doctor's adventures, it seemed that we were in need of a new face to refresh the flavor of the series.  Obviously, they went with Peter Capaldi (who himself is a Whovian—THANK GOODNESS!  No need to trust someone who's a stranger to the tales of the Whoniverse!), not because he would be good over the long run, but because they just needed to go in a different direction: a worn-down alien whose been a little reset with a face recalled from his Tennant days in ancient Pompeii and a Scottish accent with angry eyebrows!  Not to mention that I'm pretty sure new memes were born that night!

            Which brings me to my first point:

The Theatrical Entrance of the Two Temporal Travelers

Only on #DoctorWho can a T-Rex be choking on a TARDIS! However it looks great! Someone must've roped in Spielberg! #afterwho #doctorwho
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) August 24, 2014

            A Tyrannosaurus Rex in Victorian England choking on the TARDIS…..  Finally, the writer(s) redeemed themselves at Whovian storytelling!  Because nowhere else can there be such an entrance!  NOWHERE!  DO YOU HEAR/READ ME, NETWORK TELEVISION?!  NOWHERE!!!!!  *plungersmacks self*  Sorry, a little ranty, a lot squirrelly during drafting (especially since Fox is doing "Gracepoint," the bastardized/Americanized version of Broadchurch that is apparently what mainstream America is allergic to, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!).  But this introduction and quite a few funny moments really make up for the floppiness in the last Christmas episode, The Time of the Doctor (which I was able to tolerate watching again, noticing a few references to previous Doctors that I haven't seen before).

            Secondly…..

Character Analysis: The WHO in "Doctor Who"

(Shuddup, critics!)

            The new Doctor is definitely a little more callous, a bit more insensitive and definitely less relatable in an alien kind of way, like, "I'm an ALIEN, with non-ginger kidneys!"  Lots of memories seem to have faded from his mind, and he is less cuddly.  He is a little more angry, and he's got the eyebrows to match!  To me, in that scene in the "escape pod," which turns out to be—SPOILER ALERT!—a skin balloon, he also seems to be a wee bit a of a drinker; I have very few memories, in my time of being a new-gen Whovian ("new-gen" meaning having come into the Whovian "fandom"—hate that word—during the series reboot), of seeing the Doctor with a glass of anything alcoholic ON SCREEN!  Anyways, he seems to dislike the human race quite a bit, much like Eccleston's Doctor (number 9), according to Diane (found on Twitter at @DiHard11).  Capaldi also seems to have difficulty expressing that whole manic, hyper, young, rapid thinking Smith's Doc (#11) had.  He is HAWT in that Kuroshitsuji-esque-butler-looking-but-still-an-outfit-that-can-stand-on-its-own suit ensemble, but another downside (despite the non-ginger kidneys) is that he's a spitter.  YUCK!  I hate that, I just do; in fact, going to one of the worst case scenarios, hawking a "loogie" makes me gag, having suffered through seeing many in high school water fountains and hearing the sound over and over again.  *shudders*  #HighSchoolNightmares

            As for the companion, Clara is still clever, able to think on her feet (or horizontally on her back/front/either side), but the usually sassy confidence was definitely shaken with the change of face and personality.  It was obvious in the beginning, and certainly towards the end, but we were all going through that, enduring the Whovian's Cycle of Regeneration Reaction.  And I can relate to that; in fact, in the aftershow After Who Live, hosted by Chris Hardwick (Wow, is this the reason for the @midnight hiatus?  Answer: NO.), a few celebrity guests (specifically, Wil Wheaton, Alton Brown, Mark Gatiss, et al.) discussed how the companion can be expressing the same emotions we were feeling, which is true: the companion is the audience's avatar in the Whoniverse, albeit one we can't control all the time unless it's in fanfiction written to satisfy our inner desires.  (*eyebrow waggle*)  But Clara still delivered her usual Impossible Girl charisma, talents and skills, looking hawt in Victorian era clothing and delivering a kind of emotionally fueled banter, reflecting our thoughts of "Who is he now?"  (She could be a Bond Girl!  Somebody, please!  Contact Time Lord 007 and inform him of this!)  It is a shame, though, that Jenna Louise-Coleman will be leaving the series by Christmastime, which begs the question: how will she leave?  Will she be killed off, like all her other selves?  Or will she be disembarking at her final destination, with the possibility of a return during some sort of huge epic special episode like Martha Jones and Rose Tyler?  This discussion must be held!

            With these two paired up, and aided by Madame Vastra, her wife Jenny, and Strax (the potato clone with a craving for war and battles and glory, LIKE A POTATO KLINGON!), they were able to provide the core of the episode, the A(liens)-Team that were able to fight what's wrong.  They also were able to provide a LOT of hilarious moments and new memes!  I believe some were tweeted about….

Planet of the Pudding Brains! Great for a tshirt! #CREATE #doctorwho @dihard11 @educatordalek @notgaydalek
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) August 24, 2014

So New #DoctorWho episode was actually pretty great! I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. Anyone else catch it?
— Renelly (@NellyMorel) August 25, 2014

12 misses Amy...interesting. #DeepBreath
— -Di.☯ DiHardPodcast (@DiHard11) August 24, 2014

Harvesting parts! Yes it's from The Girl in the Fireplace! #DeepBreath I was wondering about that!
— -Di.☯ DiHardPodcast (@DiHard11) August 24, 2014

"I'm right here. Standing in front of you. Please. Just... Just see me." I may have been crying at this point. #DoctorWho #DeepBreath
— Carine Brunet (@crazypandaninja) August 25, 2014

The numbers are in...and the 12th Doctor is IN: http://t.co/9H24a4HAvY #DoctorWho
— Sci-Fi Storm (@scifistorm) August 25, 2014

I loved the term "Planet of the Pudding Brains," especially since it could make a GREAT t-shirt!  And the moments with Vastra knocking out the Clock Doc in that way, Strax doing the whole "here's some 'clean' water," and medical examination thing, as well as knocking out Clara with the newspaper and going through the whole "dip him in acid" bit—all that had me cracking up, laughing so hard (much like Phil "Bad Astronomer" Plait did that one time....) that I was worried I was going to wake up my neighbors!  I can't watch it again and again without laughing!

            And, finally….

The Plot—TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD, But Not Really…..

            The plot actually works: grand, hilarious entrance and whole identity crisis, mixed together with the issue of clockwork androids that remind you of Girl In the Fireplace, and the base consisting of the audience waiting for the "I am the Doctor," moment just seems to make it work well like a thoroughly-blended smoothie.  Or perfect-thickness milkshake—I say milkshake, because I like milkshakes better; it's just a matter of preference, I say!  Not to mention the well-done scenes of Clara struggling to hold her breath and passing out, the flashbacks, the lead clock-droid, any other scenes you may like—this one is for the "Excellent Episodes" pile, especially with the new TARDIS interior!  I didn't notice the new windows and I'm pretty sure that the TARDIS is sporting a fresher coat of blue paint, but there are new round things inside (YAY, ROUND THINGS!), and a library area in the main control room, with more seats throughout!  MOAR YAYS, BUT FOR SEATS!  Though, I might add complaints from others such as my parents (classic Whovians, from the Tom Baker era) and Reppy the Republican Dalek, as well as the Deviants in Deviant Art's Devart chat later on after initially posting this review.

            However, questions abound with SPOILERS!  First of all, where the hell is that "promised land," looking a hell of a lot like MY Garden?  Is it part of the TARDIS?  And who is this Missy chick?  I can totally get an Evil vibe from her (even though she's a fictional character; yes, I know, Dad.), but the ethics (Lawful/Neutral/Chaotic) axis is questionable.  There may be an underlying motive for it, and the brief disappearance of the Doctor after the initial conflict raises even more questions, which doesn't help his alibi in regards to this new problem.  I think my current (at the time of publishing this blog post) theory for this story arc can be best expressed in my tweet:

It looks like the #clockdoc has more secrets than we thought. Missy = playful immoral TARDIS? #afterwho #skinballoon #doctorwho #wholockplz
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) August 24, 2014

And I loved seeing that familiar face at the end!!!!  It helped make that transition easier on us Whovians!  Well, me definitely; others probably want to speak for themselves.  And when that took place, I could, then, see the previous Doctor in the Clock Doc!  That was quite helpful, and I loved it; I hope this happens again in the future regenerations of Doctor Who!  I also loved After Who Live!  I hope it continues throughout the season; especially since I can see how much of a workaholic Hardwick is—yet another project to add to his pile: @midnight, Nerdist Industries and Podcast, All Star Bowling, and Talking Dead, to name a few.  I think he needs to be strapped down, sedated a wee bit, and given a massage!  IT'S NOT A KIDNAPPING BUT AN INTERVENTION, HARDWICK, BECAUSE ALL OUR POINTS ARE BELONG TO YOU!

            All in all, 4.5 plungers/TARDISes/sonic screwdrivers/Doctors out of 5!  And I hope that the accessory hand thing takes off like Doc Five's accessory celery.  These clockwork droids, along with Missy (and Miss Tasha Lem, Mother Superious of the Church of the Papal Mainframe/Church of Silence), would make GREAT costumes for a Doctor Who cosplay event that is going to take place October 2014 in Bethlehem, PA (which is within my sector).  There are going to be cosplay groups coming from ALL OVER just for this event!  One of the main sponsors is one of my frequent haunts: The Underground Lair, the nerdshop that has "vintage" toys, items that the Santa Time Lord never gifted to you for Christmas in your childhood, games galore, Whovian merchandise and items that were crafted by local residents (whose species have yet to be determined), Potter-things, gay-pride items (all for you, NotGayDalek!), and other items that are for sale for a great price!  They are willing to purchase toys you want to get rid of or help you sell them for a certain percent of the price!  (They are not a pawn shop, therefore they will not haggle over the price they are willing to pay.  Don't even try; Dan told me so himself.)  I plan on being there, taking pictures and doing coverage for the blog and stuffs, but YOU SHOULD TRANSMAT OVER AND BE THERE, TOO!  Your attendance is required by the Sontaran-Dalek Alliance!  Let's make the streets of Bethlehem, PA, bleed TARDIS BLUE!  MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!  (For the record, it wasn't my idea, but I do like it and am allowing it to happen!)

            Anyways, I hope the improvements continue (despite the oddly different intro sequence; that's the reason why I call Capaldi's doc the Clock Doc; I mean, come on!  I loved the old smoky sort of timey-wimey wormhole temporal vortex!  But why have the intro focus on clocks?  It makes no sense to me at all!  But now's not the time to rant about it…), because I shall be a Whovian until I am nothing but a timeline in my giant TARDIS-tomb on Trenzalore!  And with that, in the present, Non-Greenwich meantime, I hope you enjoy your regenerated tacquitos!  Because they're Scottish with non-ginger kidneys in need of our love!

P.S.  The following tweet MUST BE EXPRESSED!  And retweeted and overshared!  BEHOLD!

I hope that the sentences, "You redecorated! I don't like it," becomes a running joke amongst us Whovians! Let's keep it going! #DoctorWho
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) August 24, 2014

P.P.S.  Where can I get one of those Team Adipose t-shirts?  I must acquire one straight away!  MY DEAR OOD!  I have a quest for you, and you must embark on it immediately for it to be completed (with autographs) in time for Christmas/my birthday!......  *zooms off on hoverbike*

A Review of the Great Cosmos: A New Journey Begins When Another Ended

            Wow!  WOW!  I know this is a highly verbose review, but I am typing this up as fast as possible so that all the knowledge and impression of the show doesn't fade away from my brain or attention span!  The theme for this blog post is Snow Park by Connect Ohm!

            On Sunday, March 9, 2014, at 9:00pm EDT on all the Fox and National Geographic networks, Dr. Neil deGrasse Tyson, astrophysicist, director of the Hayden Planetarium, author and hilarious scientist, led us on our first steps on a journey that Dr. Carl Sagan started a generation ago, on the show Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (preceded by Cosmos: A Personal Voyage) with the (paraphrased) words, "It's time to get going again."  I've been treated to a perspective that the late loved Dr. Sagan has only introduced us to, to a thirst of knowledge that many scientists are trying to quench with new information about Life, the Universe and Everything (to which the Answer is 42!  HA!  Hitchhiker's Guide, people!  Come on, nerd out with me with that one shitty joke!).

            I have to say, the introduction was mind blowing!  I swear, all the visuals in the intro sequence gave my mind a blowjob!  I loved it so much, I think I was sort of drooling at the end of it, but only "sort of" because I was having dinner, my Soup of the Cosmos (which I will share the recipe to at the end of this post; it's perfect for people on the lower end of the income scale!).  Anyways, to have Dr. Tyson start the show at the edge of the very same sea cliff that Dr. Sagan stood on when he started his Personal Voyage is entirely poetic; it's like Dr. Sagan was still with us, continuing our journey through the universe that we dwell in.  I've been fortunate enough to be able to watch Cosmos: A Personal Voyage thanks to National Geographic airing it before the premiere of A Spacetime Odyssey.  We were taken on a journey of the mind, to the edge of our universe, being given our address in it, which I have to say is a little inaccurate: according to the Doctor of the Whoniverse, we live in the Sol system, on Sol-3!  Not just "the Solar System"!  So please, astronomers and astrophysicists, incorporate that into our universal address!  But I swear my brain was fried when we went a bit "Inception" with the Universe-inside-of-a-multiverse-that's-inside-of-another-Universe.  My nose didn't start bleeding, but at least my brain got a warm-up before the show: Journey to the Edge of the Universe, narrated by Alec Baldwin, describing our observation of the universe as we come across celestial bodies in the sky, such as "angry moons", dangerous hypernovas, etc, etc.; during that show, I managed to come across a realization of my own, Dr. Carl Sagan style:

If we were to travel across the Universe beyond our galaxy, we'd also be traveling back into time, as the universe is not only a bubble of a network, but also has a reverse sort of tree-ring effect to the point where the farther we travel from Earth to the edge of the Universe we live in, the more we travel into the older parts of the universe, and if we exited past the universe's threshold, we would've been able to witness the Big Bang, to which I ascribed the physical edge of our Universe, the Big Bang Threshold.

            Not only that, Dr. Tyson says that our Universe started out smaller than a subatomic particle; in a sense, it relatively still is if you're far enough past the Big Bang Threshold, outside of every Universe located within our multiverse; we're still smaller than sub-atomic particles in a universe before the Big Bang, like cells in the human body.  Yes, it's frustratingly confusing, but it really is Inception-like!  BWAHHHHH!!!

            I'm sorry, through that shared epiphany, if I made everyone's noses bleed and their brains hurt more than Chris Hardwick's and Matt Mira's did when Dr. Tyson described the Ascent of the Cubes in Nerdist Podcast episode number 139.  If you have to be redirected to it, I suggest you check out the bottom part of this ranty blog post.

            But I have to say, "Spaceship of the Imagination" is pretty cool, despite the name!  I would've loved to have kept the retro look Dr. Sagan had in his spaceship, but Dr. Tyson's ship is a bit cooler, having the ability to not just travel across space but also peer through time, with its poetic floor-portal to the past in the floor (archaeology anyone?) and ceiling-portal to the future (STAR TREK IS OUR FUTURE!  If we have not destroyed ourselves with the thermonuclear World War III or disastrous climate change due to our self-inflicted global warming!), and has a sort of gyroscopic sort of bridge in that spaceship (in a realm beyond ours that has no "up"?  Really, Dr. Tyson?), which, to me, is in the shape of a dandelion seed.  You see, the dandelion seed is quite an integral part of the Cosmos program, and Dr. Sagan used it quite a bit when he was hosting Personal Voyage, and it only seems poetic to be traveling on that seed throughout the universe as we know it, as the dandelion seed in the organic sense is actually an organism traveling in its own spaceship to someplace new where it can colonize the ground it lands on.  But I also have to say, "Spaceship of the Imagination," doesn't exactly have a good ring to it: I understand that it's, to put it in Dr. Tyson's words in Nerdist podcast episode #139, "a journey of the mind," but couldn't you just name it the "Tyson TARDIS"?  Or the A.S.S. Imagination?  Just saying.

            But the visuals were stunning, the inclusion of history in the science exploration, the addition of the multiverse inside of the lectures, the sharing of the perspective of our slice of time in the universe, how the birth of the universe and our existence would've looked liked spread over a Gregorian calendar year, how religion treated new ideas, all of it, to me, was pure GENIUS!  I was looking forward to this premiere, as my friend Jesse (who still needs to do that superhero blog post) also was, despite not having access to cable.  And I can't wait to continue on with our next steps in this journey of 13 episodes where we are enlightened over how scientifically accurate the theory of evolution is, and the whole Creationism issue may go back as far as the Big Bang, which I'm sure was not instigated by Stewie Griffin restarting his time machine.  Which is why during the show, I posted these tweets:

OW OW OW! My brain is hurting! Because @neiltyson mentioned the multiverse! #cosmos
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) March 10, 2014

Shut up, Hamm! #cosmos
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) March 10, 2014

            And I hate to spoil it for everyone, but I have to describe the end bit: I saw all the old footage, and the Sagan seaside cliff bit, and I can't help it but I cried a little much like Matt Mira teared when he was watching the last shuttle launch of NASA, but for reasons a little bit different from what Dr. Tyson ascribed to him in that first episode of Nerdist podcast that he was on all that couple of years ago.  In fact, I tweeted this when it happened….

Dammit. Tears. #cosmos
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) March 10, 2014

all because not only did Dr. Tyson talk about how much of a leader Dr. Sagan was, but he also suddenly pulled out Dr. Sagan's planner, and turned to the page where an appointment with a young Dr. Tyson was listed, and it was not only a tale of how a young man growing up in the Sky View apartments in the Bronx was influenced by his genius and his tutelage, but it was also, in Dr. Tyson's words, a sort of "passing of the torch," which made me think a little: Dr. Sagan would've been so proud of him, and he wouldn't have trusted anyone else to do the reboot of his show, because Dr. Tyson would've been the only one to do it right.  He influenced many scientists, much like Aristotle influenced many mathematicians.  He is the Aristotle of our time, and if he saw the show today, he would've approved, despite any flashiness.  RIP, Dr. Carl Sagan, wherever you are, whether you're in heaven, the great big observatory/laboratory in the sky or even in the fourth or fifth dimensions.  We miss you, even though I haven't watched your show before Saturday or Sunday, March 8/9th, 2014!

Our Universe Is One Giant Pot of Soup: A Recipe for the Soup of the Cosmos

            Because I was running a little low on food, I improvised my dinner, anxious to have it be done by the time Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (which shouldn't be "STO", because "STO" is already taken by Star Trek Online!  It should be ASTO, so as to not confuse people!  #addressingthiswiththehopethatIAmNotTooLate #longhastags #hashtaggingoutsideofTwitter) aired.  And I tweeted:

I think i just came up with a new recipe: Soup of the Cosmos. @lisar_m @dihard11 @nasagoddard
— Eden Pyrithea (@LadyEden1337) March 10, 2014

because I'm sure that it has not yet been done in detail!  Nerd-Chef Alton Brown might disagree, but goddammit, IT'S MY RECIPE AND I SHALL SHARE IT WITH Y'ALL FOR NEXT WEEK'S EPISODE!

Soup of the Cosmos (aka, Cosmic Soup)

Pasta In Potato Pot (aka, a saucepan that's the second to smallest you have)

1 ½ cup salted water

1/2 cup small pasta shells

Broth In Vegetable Pot (aka, smallest pot you have)

1 ½ cup salted water

1 chicken bouillon cube

1 tablespoon + 1 teaspoon chopped basil

1 tablespoon (or more) dried minced onion

½ cup panko bread crumbs

Other

Fancy shredded Mexican blend cheese

Four packets of string cheese, unwrapped and chopped into 1/8-1/4 inch long pieces

1.  Boil pasta according to directions.
2. In small "Vegetable pot", boil water; crush and add chicken bouillon cube, stir.  Add basil, minced onion and panko breadcrumbs; stir, let sit.
3.  Drain pasta when finished, return to "Potato pot" without heat.  Add broth to pasta, stir.  Stir in shredded cheese and chopped string cheese, making sure it melts.
4.  Serve warm.  Makes two servings.

Isn't our Universe like this soup?  Isn't the basil like the asteroids and comets, the chopped string cheese like our planets, the pasta shells like our stars in the sky, the shredded cheese like the nebular clouds and the broth like the dark matter of space?  It's so poetic that I think it's appropriate for everyone to have.  Also, it's great for Lent because it doesn't have real meat!  It has chicken broth, but not REAL meat or poultry or pork!  Can't the bouillon be an exception to this, Church?  PLEASE?

           Anyways, I hope you enjoyed Cosmos ASTO just as I enjoyed my soup with it.  And I hope everyone gets to experience the enlightenment and pleasure of education in the hopes that we can all become smarter, we can all become nerds and continue to have intelligent discussions about science, the universe, the multiverse, and our place in the—SQUIRREL!  *scamper, chase, falls asleep and snores*

P.S. I have GOT to share this tweet!  This tweet won the Internets last night in my opinion....so go Favorite and Retweet this, because it's HILARIOUSLY TRUE!

The show #Cosmos is the perfect qualifier for my online dating: "If you don't find Cosmos fascinating we are not going to be life partners."
— Andy Johns (@ibringtraffic) March 10, 2014

War Horse: A Tale of Bravery and Magnificence

            Still no word on a completed guest post about superheroes (JESSE!  THESE PEOPLE ARE WAITING!) so how's about a review of a movie sans the Broadway show?  For this post, it's the (optional) theme song of the full War Horse Soundtrack.

            If anyone's ever heard of War Horse, they might think of the Broadway show, with the amazing puppets, and the brilliant actors making it all seem so real.  But the movie is just as spectacular!  You get all of these great shots where even the scenery gets to be the star of the show, where these 6-star actors (out of five, mind you) make your wildest dreams come true, and you are just taken on the journey, like a spirit witnessing the miracle of a horse surviving World War I, that many people thought was the War to End All Wars.  It was utterly brilliant!

            Not very many people realize that Steven Spielberg directed this movie much like Vincent Van Gogh created his paintings; he used the skies of Devonshire to his advantage, the moors like a landform just waiting to be used as a backdrop for an epic movie, he used the landscape to its advantage, the surrounding areas as part of this great beautiful story, and it seems that he sees it all in his mind and just HAS to make it real.  It all came together very beautifully as a work of art that tells this war story, this journey of a horse from birth to war to home again, who is a character in and of itself, that had to be trained to run into battle instead of away from danger.  In fact, Tom"Loki" Hiddleston, who played Captain Nicholls in this film, was witness to how Spielberg directed and constructed shots for the film; it might be a lot of hard work to other directors, but it was like "water out of a tap for him," because it would just flow with ease.  If I couldn't make it as a director for my Polar Vortex film, then I probably would've co-directed with Spielberg, because he's just.  So.  Brilliant!

            The acting was incredible, the horses were probably trained extremely^2 well to act properly, in the way that was just not only natural, but also like they are also the stars of the film, having to bear many a rider from many backgrounds on their backs.  And what's also great, having ridden horses myself until my teen years, is that they never had one shot in the film be of the horses taking a piss or a shit.  I'm serious, it isn't fun to have to wait around for the horse to finish their business for me to continue with dressage riding.  BUT(T)!  Squirrel moment aside, they were beautiful and they deserve their own stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and knighthood in the UK.  Of course, the knighthood will be up to Her Majesty.

            I have to spoil it a tiny bit.  Because there is just this one beautiful scene, one where I will not reveal where it lies in sequence of the film lest I spoil it for everyone who didn't watch it but SHOULD….  It's a scene where you're on the moors of Devon, and the skies are awash in the fiery sunset glow of the sun.  It's so beautiful, like the skies are awash with flame, and everything is lit in the firelight of the sky.  You can't help but just go, "Oh….my….GODS!  Someday, this HAS to be the setting for a photo shoot!"  (Heh, you might not go "PHOTO SHOOT!"  But, I confess that I actually did.)  But it was just so beautiful, like Spielberg's version of Van Gogh's Starry Night, with the color temperature thermostat set to warm!  All those oranges and yellows just giving it the right sense of amazing jaw-dropping BEAUTY!

            I also have to admit that I did not realize that it was a book FIRST…  I would LOVE to see the Broadway show for sure, but now I have to find the book and read it!  Because Mama always told me to read the book first!  However, I don't think Spielberg could do the book any more justice than he already did!  He did excellent with the firing squad scene, with the shot construction and execution, Tom Hiddleston did excellent as Captain Nichols, Benedict Cumberbatch was wonderful as Major Jamie Stewart, and it was just the right amount of jaw dropping beauty mixed together with emotions and storytelling and character AND DELICIOUS CHEEKBONES!!!!!  Even I would nominate this movie for every Oscar category, including made-up categories I'm still trying to come up with for @midnight's Hashtag Wars!

20 PLUNGERS OUT OF TEN!!!!  AND I COMMANDETH YOU ALL:

GO WATCH IT NOWWW!!!!!

A Doctor Who Dalekmas Special Review: The Time of the Doctor

This blog's theme music is "In the House, In a Heartbeat" by John Murphy (Oxylice Remix).

            Welcome back!  I hope everyone's Christmas/Sithmas/Dalekmas/Kwanzaa was good!  Mine was meh, but I did get some pretty neat presents, including a Big Bang Theory pen that has a light that projects the word "Bazinga!" onto a wall or other flat surface, a Doctor Who themed cookbook and Doctor Who Post-it Notepads, and even a ThinkGeek gift certificate from my grandparents!  (As in the ones I visited while on holiday over Thanksgiving)  And my half-Vulcan father got a hippopotamus for Christmas!  W00t for Dad!  Anyways, thank you!  I really appreciate it, family!

            But that's not what I'm here for.  If you're a dedicated Whovian like myself, you probably watched the Doctor Who Christmas special that night.  I, too, watched it with my Whovian parents.  And I decided, you know what?  I'm going to review this one, too!

            AHEM!!!!!

            It wasn't that long ago that the 50th Anniversary Doctor Who special episode titled "The Day of the Doctor" was broadcast all across Earth.  For many, it was epic, surely one of Steven Moffat's better episodes.  We nerds surely expected the Christmas special to be able to at least hold even a birthday candle to it.

            Unfortunately, that was not the case.  Despite being 90 minutes long (including commercial breaks), anyone would've thought that Moffat would be able to whip out another ball-busting episode that would explain so much.  Instead, this one feels half-assed.  Well, perhaps not half-assed; more like 3/5-assed.  It feels like a college essay that I would manage to bullshit together at the very last minute before class.

            First of all, the intro part wasn't really done well.  The narration that explains what is going on makes the scene feel out of place, about as out-of-place as that Cyberman head.  I understand that, in the episode, there is a signal that is being broadcast to everyone in the Whoniverse who has space travel, and they all came to take a look, but it would've been more believable to me to have the Doctor detect it on his instruments and actively track it to Trenzalore on screen, only to discover that many of his enemies have gathered there.  The nudity part was a little humorous (because I'm still a little immature), but the Christmas dinner scenes just make it very confusing, with the turkey and the family and such.  It doesn't really fit in there, despite the hilarious scene of the Doctor and Clara talking about using the sonic screwdriver on the turkey, only to need a time machine on it.

            Not to mention that even though Mother Superius Tasha of the Church of the Papal Mainframe was gorgeous and amazing (even as a transformed humanoid Dalek), many of the different alien races were there for the sole purpose of being fillers; according to Dad, they didn't contribute to the storyline very much, especially the Cybermen, the Weeping Angels and the Sontarans.  It was hilarious to see the Doctor arrive on a saucer of Daleks brandishing the eyestalk only to go, "Oops!  Wrong ship!"  and then do it again with the Cybermen and Handles the Cyberman head, but it served very little purpose other than to make us laugh.  At least, we finally learned about Madame Kovarian's radical members of the Silence movement, who were once members of the Church of the Papal Mainframe, and what the creepy memory-fucking aliens really were.  But even explaining things didn't help this episode.

            There were plotholes that needed filling, like the technology barricade thing that the TARDIS could sneak through, Clara whispering into the crack to the Time Lords on Gallifrey asking to help him, etc.  And on top of that, it seems that Moffat was trying to make this installment BIG, but the episode wound up being too big in the efforts of being epic that the episode's story Moffat was trying to tell wound up being lost and convoluted.  I get that time passed on Trenzalore for the Doctor, and he aged, and that, technically, he used up all his regenerations, but the crack in the skin of reality making a reappearance is just pointless, and it doesn't help at all.  I mean, come on!  Moffat was grabbing bits and pieces from previous episodes and patching it all together into a Christmas episode, stretching it out over 90 minutes (again, including commercial breaks) and, disappointingly, it didn't work; Moffat had excellent episodes in his portfolio (Blink being one of them) but this episode is more along the lines of that WiFi episode with the Great Intelligence, and the episode with the black cubes--disappointingly shitty.  No wonder all the haters and critics chased him off of Twitter.

            However, I will be honest: I'll miss Matt Smith.  This charming Frankenstein-headed actor won me over with Doctor 11's final moments.  I mean, to have his thoughts go back to Amelia Pond, who appears to have been played by another little girl, not Karen Gillan's cousin (Really?!  You couldn't get her so you substituted in some other ginger-haired little girl with her face obscured by a child's drawings?!  Another point taken away there, Moffat!), is very touching.  But the tears finally fell when adult Amy came to him in his imagination, and said to him, "Raggedy Man, good night."  It really got to me at that point, how his mother-in-law companion (a person he really connected with, loved and cared for) said "Good night" to him before his regeneration finally completed itself.  It's like the Ood singing Tennant's Doctor to "sleep."  It just means a lot to have someone do that for you as a sort of farewell, especially if you're the last of the Time Lords in that particular Whoniverse and (almost) all alone.

STARFISH OF POWAHHHH!!!!

            But the regeneration scenes were stupid in this episode.  I mean, to have the Doctor shoot down Dalek fighters and a saucer with his regeneration starfish of energy is pretty ridiculous, but to have that happen, reboot his youthfulness and then stop just before he changes faces is illogical.  Tennant did it right: he visited all of his companions and friends before retreating to his TARDIS, saying, "I don't want to go," and then assuming the starfish position and regenerating.  But it's stupid to do the major starfish of POWAHHHH then stop it, and then change faces very quickly, so quickly that it was like, you snap your fingers and it's done--it could've been done better; it should've been done differently, to not have the flow of that part of the story be all jerky with going and stopping and going and stopping, but rather be continuous instead of confusing.

            Right now, I don't trust Capaldi as the Doctor just yet.  In a sense, each actor the Doctor regenerates into has to earn that name on screen.  It's like, you see the Doctor you fell in love with regenerate into this weirdass stranger you don't trust or know, but later on in that actor's first full episode, you can see them BE the Doctor, at which point you say, "Yes!  That's definitely him!  That's the Doctor right there!  Welcome to the show!"  He has to go through that, instead of just being some old fogey grandfather you don't really like.  You know, that grandfather you have, who says things like, "My kidneys!  I don't like their color!"  (What color do you want them to be, Capaldi?  GINGER?!  Do you want Ginger kidneys?!)  I understand the plan (according to my half-Vulcan father) is that Capaldi doesn't wind up being the Doctor for too long (perhaps for a single series, like Eccleston).  But I do hope that the series continues as long as it can go on.  I also hope that Neil Gaiman writes more episodes for Doctor Who; he should've written this one because it'd be over 9,000 times better!

            I do believe I know how the series finale's ending will go.  Here, I'll share it with you.  But you might want to take several steps back and hold tight to your socks, lunch and nuts because this is the part that will be better than Twilight…

At long last, it's the Doctor's final living moments.  He knows he is about to finally die, having used up all of his regenerations long ago, over thousands of years.  He's seen stars form and die, entire populations be born and wiped out, friends and family take both their first and their last breaths.  He's married, loved and lost people he remembers quite vividly.  Rose Tyler, Donna Noble, Sara Jane Smith, Amy and Rory Pond, Clara Oswald, each one seeming to whisper their gratitude and love into his ear, despite that it's only air occupying the space next to his head.  With each ragged breath, he grows more weary, knowing that he has mere moments to set things right.  He sees a crack in the wall, the same crack he saw on these same fields of Trenzalore he fought on to defend the helpless residents of Christmas, emanating a beautiful golden light, almost seeming to come from some sort of heavenly afterlife, and he remembers his people, his home, Gallifrey, which he saved by stashing it away into a pocket universe.  At that moment, he remembers what he has to do.  The question is asked through the crack--"Doctor WHO?" to which he responds with a very quiet unintelligible whisper.  The question is asked again--"Doctor WHO?"--and he realized that he wasn't loud enough.  He lifts his head, takes a deep breath and finally says his name, his real name, the name he kept guarded all those years, and… it felt good, like the weight of his secret was lifted off his shoulders.  The ages-old question that echoes across the universe is asked one more time--"Doctor WHOOOO?"  Frustrated, the last of the Time Lords of Gallifrey shouts his real name, bellowing it with every last fiber of his being, unlocking the seals he so carefully placed to protect his home world.  The planets tremble, the sky is ripped apart, and an orb emerges.  Gallifrey has returned to the skies, the final act of kindness the Doctor was able to bestow unto reality during his life, using his last breath to save the people who waited for the moment to return, while the ghosts of his past companions look on, smiling tearfully, before turning and disappearing into the ether.  The Doctor is dead, but his memory will live on forever, having touched billions of lives with his kindness, humor, ferocity & love.

            How's THAT for writing, Moffat?!  Of course, nobody is allowed to repost, reprint, etc. etc, without express written permission from me.  (This includes you, Google and journalists!)

            Anyways, that's all I can come up with.  Yes, there are a few moments where The Time of the Doctor was pretty good, but overall, it seems like it was a failing effort to explain where the Silence came from, the whole story and reasoning behind the question that should not be answered for at least another 20 years or so, and it was really one of Moffat's floppier episodes.  He could've been writing for Sherlock at the same time, and was possibly fairly distracted, but I do wish that he does better for any more episodes he writes for any show, including Sherlock.

            Rating: 3/10 stars

            Merry Christmas!  And Dalekmas!  And Sithmas!  And Merry Kwanzaa!  I hope you had as much fun as I did and I hope next year will be better!  Get ready for the new year, because it should be epic!